Watch Chris Bliss juggle to The Beatles' Golden Slumbers and have your definition of juggling as party trick completely and utterly obliterated, revolutionized, and altered. You know, juggled.
Send Gene Perelson your regards for this pearl of a find.
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim, who never could juggle
Wok the Fok? is very very wrong. Or rather, very very wong. And perhaps even more so phor the phact that somehow I pheel it's okay to post this phlash philm on making pho because it was sent to me, one yellow person, phrom another yellow person.
Thanks Lanha, for the totally un-pciphied phun.
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim
The story of the mysteriously disappearing sharks in the Seattle Aquarium was introduced to the SMPT staff several years ago. Around our imaginary fireplace, Gene Perelson told us that octopuses were found to be the culprits devouring 3 to 4 foot long sharks late in the night. With the fear of carnivorous shadows overwhelming subconsciousness, none of us could go to sleep after Gene's eerie re-telling. And by "none of us," I mean me.
As time passed, so did the story and the fear. But now, it's back. Thanks to online videos and Catherine Price, we can no longer sleep again. And by "we" I mean me, again.
Here it is for your viewing pleasure but not "ours": Octopus eats shark.
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim, who has an unusual fear of octopuses but finds them delicious!
For those of you wondering "Where on earth have those SMPT people been?" Let me tell you: we haven't. Been on earth that is. We decided to take a last-minute trip to Pluto (Orbitz was having a fare sale), only to ask when we got there "What's the big deal?" to our tour guide, Laika a.k.a. that poor dog the Russians blasted into space, who only shrugged and growled a little. Touchy dog.
Fortunately, the trip wasn't a total bust. On the ride back through the stratosphere, in lieu of the safety video, we were shown these video, appropriately called "Korean Madness" and "Korean Madness 2" of two Korean school girls singing, dancing, and well, spazzing out a la them Back Dormitory Boys.
I would like to close this post with the following moralistic non sequitur of a sidenote: I hope these videos finally break the myth that all Asians are quiet math and science geniuses. And that now you recognize that all Asians are either quiet math and science geniuses or singing and dancing spazzes. Amen.
Thanks to Souris for hilariously switching the videos much to the chagrin of the flight attendants.
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim, who went to Pluto and has the tan to prove it
And watch your cat respond with unease and fear as you shamelessly laugh at its physical comedic confusion from the sidelines! Or just watch this tape of a taped cat and watch someone else's cat respond with unease and fear as you shamelessly laugh at its physical comedic confusion from right where you are now.
Complete with enthusiastic Japanese commentary and laugh track. Tastes great, less filling!
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim
Bears3 are bits of Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant in fuzzy bear stop animation. It'll leave you rolling on the floor in laughter... to the third power.
- report by SMPT correspondent Kyoung Kim
Did you know Lucky is the Last of the Leprechauns? Here we were, thinking he's just some rascally midget obsessed with the color green and marshmellow cereal goodness, who likes to be chased after by children, when in fact, he's like the Last Unicorn, only without the silky mane or horn sticking out of his head or four-legged gallop! Watch the first two webisodes of the epic of Lucky and his quest to retrieve the Magic Charms from his arch nemesis on the official Lucky Charms site. It's riveting.
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim, who is not being paid for this post by General Mills but thinks, maybe she should
Watching The Puppy Channel is like being an aunt. You get to ooh and ahh, but aren't responsible for cleaning poop.
Just try to avoid watching in the presence of your puppy-calendared-tchotcked-shirted-mugged-stickered-desktop-screensaver freak of a co-worker. Unless you are that freak of a coworker. In which case, yes, I do think dalmation-shaped staplers are the wave of the future.
Thanks to Nathanael Johnson for not being a dog in the manger with this SMPT find.
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim, who suggests that the dogged procrastinator dog-ear this site for these here dog days of summer or else it'd just be a doggone shame
They're chronically late, make fun of your choice of footwear, snarl at your limited knowledge of restaurants, think you always "understand", force you to hang out with their sucky choice of partners, you have to buy them a birthday present every year, they're generally not giant-sized, they don't growl, or grow creepy little vegetable people. So screw friends. Make fiends!
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim who says giant kitties are always better so long as you've taken your allergy medicine. Then they're evil.
Crying While Eating. It's a hoot until someone chokes (no one chokes).
- report by SMPT correspondent, Kyoung Kim, who says there's something about this that turns you off food for a bit and who also on an unrelated topic was out yesterday fixing the hole in her navel
